akira's Diaryland Diary

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12.17.09

Now and then I get a slap in the face reminding me where I come from. Reminding me who I really am. Sometimes I see it coming. Other times it creeps up behind me in a shadow and pounces. My mind starts racing, the flashbacks, edgyness, and sleeplessness kick in and overwhelm with a tightening grip. That's really the only time I really question why I stopped doing drugs. It's not the high I miss, more of the foggy mind numbing that I can really use when this happens. It's draining going through this and still having to put on everyday face at work. Restless sleep mixed with my stomach being screwed because of nerves doesn't help either. Block it out Akira. Just block it out. I'll be fine and things will back to normal. Or at least my reality of what's normal.

- 12.17.09

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