akira's Diaryland Diary

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same 'ol, same 'ol

sometimes i want to call it quits. i get so sick of the same 'ol, same 'ol that i can't stand it. the old akira starts itching to come out and play. resume the life she once had. up all night. out and about. going from one persons bed, couch, backseat to the next. but that's not a life one should live when they have a teenage daughter. nor is it a life one should live at my age. but that still doesn't change the fact that sometimes i miss it. i felt freeer and more incontrol of what was going on with my life. like right now i just feel like life is going on around me, and i'm just here, going through the motions.
*ding*
the nights haven't been kind to me as of recent. bizzare dreams walking that fine line of being nightmarish. i have no idea why. i'm tired and short and ready for this little phase to be over. i can't think of any of those little "milestones" that are always so key to triggering my nightmares, so not really sure when it'll pass but i can only hope soon.
)o( ave akira

- 8*9*09

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