akira's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- i'm back I should be going to work....SHOULD be, but I'm not. I've escaped into my twisted little mind again, running and hiding from the shit that I should be dealing with and choosing not to. Here I can explore ideas openly, say things I would otherwise keep to myself. I told Riley that maybe I need to stop talking with him. I don't want to fuck him over and not help him out with school, but at the same time I get the feeling like I'm just draggin' along and takin up his time. He wasn't really pleased with this decision, telling me to think it over and decide next week. My daughter starts her "real" school on Tuesday, I'm numbing my mind fully. I've got some new fixations, Orgy's new song "Fiction (Dreams In Digital)", Fuel's "Hemorrage (In My Hands)", and Disturbed "Stupify". It's helping. I was talking to my boy the other day about craving drugs. I couldn't understand how you can crave a drug, I mean I understand it and all, I realize that it's real, but I couldn't grasp it. Today, GOT IT. What the hell? I don't know if it was the way the day felt to me or the air....all I know is for the first time, I think ever in my life, I so badly wanted to do H or M'phine. It was almost like a need. AND I DON'T NEED ANYTHING! Fucking odd I'm telling you. It's all good though. I'm working through shit like I should. My boy stated his new job on Tuesday. There are issues there that I could go off but I won't it's all me anyway. The only thing that pisses me off really about this whole thing...he's expecting me to go to sleep earlier then I want, that and lastnight he got me wasted quick so I would passout. Dick. :o) Simba called me at work yesterday just to bullshit. He thought my daughter started school this week so he wanted to see how momma was doing. He's a sweetie, he's living in New York now, MEG YOU HAD BETTER BE NICE TO HIM. I told him he has to come home for x-mas because I want to hear his NewYok accent. He's already got the fucks down perfectly. hehe ::akira goes off on a tangent:: Q what the hell is up with you??? Damn, I thought that we were tight like that, you know having the whole Tim Skold thing going on. Then you go and vote for me OPENLY??? You shit! :o) Your luck your so fucking cute you funky-cold-madina homie g. haha Just watch your cute little ass babe, that's all I have to say. AND WHAT THE FUCK IS UP WITH THE PASSWORD? *smacks head* You know I love you sweeite. Just no more voting for me k?? *giggle* ::end tangent:: I was kickin' it with this little tweakerdyke chick all day yesterday. She's fucking funny as hell. My boss was sexually harassing her, I HAD to protect her and get all possesive. She's telling me how if I was gay or bi she'd be all over me. lmao I keep telling her I'm WAY into dick but thanks for the offer. *smile* She's currently infatuated with one of my other STRAIGHT co-workers. She's got a thing for straight chick I guess it's all part of the chase, who knows. Ok I'm out. I really should be getting to work sometime today. Ave )O( Akira Oh ya...Happy Birthday to my pregnant sister in-law. WHOO HOO a new baby. :o) - 8 * 31 * 00 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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